Fashion at the End of the World

The future of fashion?

     There are two kinds of people: the spenders and the savers.  Never has this been more apparent than in the apocalypse, as shelter-in-place orders are gradually loosened to make way for a marginally more social paranoia.  The spenders have been bursting out of their dark, confining Hobbit holes like a popped can of biscuits to rush to the handful of restaurants in my city, an upscale community in Texas, that are allowing outdoor dining and 25% occupancy to those who equate a plate of enchiladas with their God-given American liberty.  They might contract the plague, but by golly, they'll do it sitting on a patio sipping a margarita that comes in a different glass than the margarita they made themselves and enjoyed on their own patio last week for markedly less than $12 plus tip.  And that's fine; choices have to be made and the economy can't stay shut down forever, but as our own household has been without an income for two months now, we're good with drinking on the cheap at home and sending good wishes for the intrepid canaries in the coal mine.  We all have to get back out there at some point.

     Face masks are a thing now, and are no less divisive in separating the spenders and the savers. We've been doing curbside grocery pickup so it's been a non-issue, but with Facebook there are no mysteries anymore.  While people are saving scads on lipstick and teeth whitening treatments, face masks have become the hot new gotta-have-it accessory in our trendy little hamlet, with the most fashionable among us modeling the latest styles in kicky leopard prints with bright fuchsia ties to add a pop of color to the season's most popular accessory.  As one ventures farther out of town the masks become more utilitarian: standard-issue PPE disposables, purchased on Amazon at a package of 50 for a cool $30. Someone with a large garage and somewhat smaller scruples isn't hurting in this pandemic.

     The extreme other end of the spectrum is, in my opinion, the most fabulous.  A series of photographs in the style of "The People of Walmart" has been making its way around the internet in a stunning display of resourcefulness and batshit-crazy.  As Stefon on SNL would say, this place has everything: maxi pads (with wings for added security), sponges-on-a-string, carved-out milk jugs that look like a homemade "Outbreak" Halloween costume, and plastic bags fastened tightly over the head (please don't do this- the idea is to NOT die of asphyxiation).  One gentleman (I think) was wearing an elaborate head-to-toe suit of puffy plastic bag material with a single large breathing tube sticking out of the top; he looked like a giant tardigrade and I was enchanted.

     Say what you will about re-entry; it's been a polarizing, often heated subject and you have to do what makes you comfortable after reviewing the evidence from experts (the lady on Facebook with access to Google and a doctor in the extended family is not an expert), as well as staying in the bounds of the laws that are currently in place for your state. One thing is for sure, though: there's nothing like a disaster to allow people's freak flags to fly high on all points of the continuum.  And to that I say: God bless America.

Resources: Groceries

How I grocery shop now.

Well. Things just keep getting curiouser and curiouser, don't they?

We're still under a shelter in place order here.  We can go out to buy groceries and pick up prescriptions, but my family is trying to keep that to curbside pickup and drive-throughs.  We're taking this order pretty seriously and want to do our part to "flatten the curve" (a phrase I had never heard before that's now become part of the national vernacular) as much as possible.  I keep sanitizer in my car and use it liberally whenever I touch anything, and we are putting dry goods in a bin for a couple of days before using them.  If we catch this thing, it certainly won't be because we weren't following instructions.

Speaking of, the hoarding has been vicious.  Before school was even cancelled, people spent the last part of Spring Break buying and hoarding as many supplies as possible, creating the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020.  I understand getting enough supplies for a couple of weeks, but the hoarding has contributed to a dearth of essentials and people are having to physically go into stores at odd hours (and, more often than not, without success) to find them.  Good luck getting toilet paper at your curbside pickup.  I was able to two days ago and it felt like winning the lottery.  But for next week's pickup (yes, we have to place curbside orders a week in advance now), no such luck.  One of my bigger concerns, as the daughter of elderly parents, is how that population will find supplies.  I learned that a lot of stores have instituted hours that are devoted to seniors alone; as a population that is more susceptible to the virus, this will hopefully mitigate crowds and shortages after overnight stocking so that senior citizens can get what they need.  These are the hours (in one place, so you don't have to hop all over the internet) for the stores that I've heard of to date:

• Albertson's: Tuesday and Thursday, 7-9 am
• Market Street: Monday and Thursday, 7-9 am
• Whole Foods: each day, 8-9 am
• Target: Wednesday, 8-9 am
• Publix: Tuesday and Wednesday, 7-8 am
• Walmart: Tuesday, first hour of business
• Winn-Dixie: Monday- Friday, 8-9 am
• Costco: Tuesday and Thursday, 9-10 am
• Dollar General: daily, first hour of business
• Big Lots: daily, first hour of business
• The Fresh Market: Monday-Friday, 8-9 am
• Sam's Club: Tuesday and Thursday, 7-9 am
• Tom Thumb: Tuesday and Thursday, 7-9 am
• Aldi: Tuesday and Thursday, 8:30-9:30
• Randall's: Tuesday and Thursday, 7-9 am
• Walgreen's: Tuesday, 8-9 am

Please note: there was some confusion that these would be the ONLY hours that seniors can shop.  Rest assured, you can shop any time you want; these hours are just reserved for only the elderly.  If you know of any additional hours and stores, please comment below.  We have to look out for our parents and grandparents during this.  

I would also encourage using delivery services such as Amazon Pantry, Walmart Grocery, Shipt, and Instacart.  It's also a great idea to call restaurants in your area; I know in ours, many are either doing curbside pickup or, in some instances, are selling raw ingredient packages for a flat fee- sometimes even with a roll of toilet paper included!  It's also a good way to support your local restaurants, as I have a feeling a lot of them are going to have a hard time bouncing back from this.  It's a tough, tough business in the best of times; something like this pandemic is positively crippling.

Finally- please, please stop panic-buying and hoarding.  There are still plenty of ways to buy what you need, and at this stage in the game we should all be at a point at which our inventory just needs a normal weekly shop to maintain.  We're all in this together, and we can get through it if everyone does their part and thinks of the big picture. 💖

Resources: Health

How I hang out with friends now...

Hey, you.

How are you doing?  But, I mean, really... how are you doing?

I get it- right now NOBODY is answering that question with, "Great! Never better!" These are tough times, and never in my life have I seen tough times THIS universal.  I know that in my house it comes in waves, and fortunately nobody's bad times have aligned as of this post.  I had a really bad day the other day and my husband was uber-productive and peppy and the morale leader of our little family.  The next day he was having a rougher day and I was doing better.  My son is in grade school and currently has no discernible bedtime and more lax screen rules (and we're doing our best to shield him from the news and our own fears), so aside from missing his friends his mental outlook has been between a 7 and a 10 at any given time. We're luckier than most on the whole.  The most positive aspect is that as a family unit? We're rocking it.  The together time has been the best part of this, and we're being respectful of reading the room and meeting needs as they arise.  But the hard fact of the matter is that this quarantine/homeschool/apocalyptic SITUATION is HARD.  It's hard and it's different and WE NEED RESOURCES.  There are a lot out there- the plus side of social media right now (we'll discuss the down side as well later).  The problem is that these resources are scattered all over the Interwebs, so I thought I'd divvy this up by specific worry over the next few days so that there's a single place to find stuff.  If you have anything to add, by all means, comment below.  I do ask that it come from a verifiable, legitimate source, though, because some homespun miracle cure that you read about on some site of dubious origin isn't going to do anyone any favors.  Which brings me to my first point:

• HEALTH

Let's start with a quiz.

1. Are you a practicing doctor?

2. Are you a practicing nurse?

3. Do you live with either of the above?

Did you answer no to all 3? Then, I adore you and I'm sure you are an expert in your given field, but you need to stop self-diagnosing and self-prescribing.  

Look.  I worked in clinical research for over a decade.  Those people testing vaccines and treatments right now? That was my world.  I've had a lot of training and a lot of on-site experience in the medical field, and my biggest takeaway is that I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  And the fact of the matter is that, unless I get tested I will not know at any given time if I for sure catch this.  And I am not equipped to know if xyz medication is going to be helpful.  And neither are you.  So if you are feeling symptoms that you are positive are ominous and Covid-19 and can't possibly be anything else,  here is what you should do:

Call your doctor.

Period.

You don't know squat until you do.

There is as much stuff circulating out there as there are idiots self-medicating with aquarium cleaner and their spouse's expired azithromycin.  None of it is reliable until you call your doctor and then go from there.  Your neighborhood Facebook group cannot diagnose you.  Your Aunt Sally with the crystals and the third eye cannot diagnose you.  Call your doctor.

Is there anything you can do preventatively?  Sure! Wash your hands.  Social distancing.  Shelter in place if that's been mandated by your area.  Above all, follow the rules, because those people having block parties right the heck next to each other are ruining it for the rest of us who can follow instructions like your average first-grader.  You will not die if you have to sit on your couch and watch Netflix.  You can still go for walks.  Get to know your family.  Catch up on your reading.  I swear you can do this.  This interview with Dr. Fauci, our apocalyptic MVP, is helpful:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8A3jiM2FNR8

Let's talk mental health, too.  Guys, it's okay to be afraid.  It's okay to be afraid, angry, lonely, worried.  You are in good company, and its hard when you have to isolate, especially if you were socially active before.  Please take advantage of video chatting, conferencing, phone calls, any way that you can stay connected to people.  I have a standing weekly happy hour with friends that is such a balm for my spirit.  Group texts with family and friends are amazing.  My kiddo is able to still do his Scout meetings and piano lessons via Zoom, which I find terribly cool.  And if it gets harder than your tribe can handle? Most therapists will do appointments via phone or video conference, and if you are out of work like a lot of us are, many will work with you in terms of deferred payments or a sliding scale.  Your insurance might cover more than you think.  But please, please, take advantage of all of these resources.  I thank God this happened in 2020 as opposed to the days of no cell phones and no internet.  If things get really, really bad, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.  You can make it through this.  You are loved.  The sun will rise on a new day and it will get better.

If therapy is just not in the cards for you, a really good resource is "Feeling Good" by David Burns, MD, who is a cognitive behavioral therapist and knows his stuff.  It can be found on Amazon and an audio version is available as well: https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-New-Mood-Therapy/dp/0380731762/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2I6SHS32LNYHH&keywords=feeling+good+by+david+burns&qid=1585426951&sprefix=feeling+goo%2Caps%2C254&sr=8-2  

Bear in mind that this book is geared more towards generalized depression; this pandemic is a very specific situation that is very new and scary to so many people.  The good news is that it is NOT forever.  I really am confident that this, too, shall pass, and in the meantime we need to find good coping mechanisms and utilize the resources we have, as well as reaching out to the people we love more than ever. Don't expect too much from yourself.  It's okay. We're all in survival mode right now. There's nothing wrong with keeping the bar a bit lower for the time being. I feel you.

I would also caution you to maybe not do the every-virus-apocalypse-movie-ever-made binge that I started the week with because I CANNOT RESIST A THEME.  Find some escapist television.  Go online to your local library and download an ebook- you can read them on your phone if you don't have a Kindle.  Take care of those outstanding house projects we never seem to have the time for.  Attend an online church service- my church has Mass on Facebook daily.  Watch every Marvel movie ever made.  Guys, we have time for all of that now.  Register for your city's disaster alert system in case anything changes and then STEP AWAY.  

I was saddened to read that child abuse cases have increased dramatically.  It's a predictable statistic given how fragile people are right now, but my gosh, our kids need our protection from the scary stuff and a sense of stability more than ever now that the world's turned topsy.  If you are having those impulses even a little bit, I implore you to get help.  If you know of a child who is being abused, please call 911 or the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453.  Also, childhelp.org is a resource for both kids and parents.  Let's protect those little ones.

Please take care of yourselves.  We are in this together even when we are apart.

Grounded.

A throwback to simpler times (eg ten days ago)

Well. This has certainly been a week, hasn't it? Let's recap: we were enjoying an idyllic Spring Break- my husband, son and I rented an RV and drove across Texas to Big Bend National Park. On the whole we had a lovely time; the scenery in Big Bend was spectacular and we had lots of laughs in the RV. I was pleasantly surprised by the RV parks where we stayed; the people there were absolutely lovely, and everybody looks out for each other there. We felt completely safe the entire time. We ran into some snafus: some elements of the rig weren't working, particularly the shower. I'm a girly-girl. I'm not the one you want as your guide on a rugged mountain hike. A hot shower every day is a must. After one small-to-middling meltdown, I resigned myself to "bathing" with the packets of wipes I brought with me on the trip (former Girl Scout- be prepared!). While we had a great time RV camping, I couldn't wait to get home to a long, hot bath and civilization.

That is not what we came home to.

I mean, the bath- yes. Still having plenty of those, and thank God for 'em. You see, while we were gone, it seems that the dang apocalypse was hitting back home. Yup- the Coronavirus pandemic of 2020. We've been home for a week and a half now, and it's becoming jarringly clear that life as we knew it? O-v-e-r. At least for the time being. School has come to a halt and we are HOMESCHOOLING NOW OMG (more on that later). There is a run on pretty much everything. Toilet paper? Ha. Eggs? If you get to the right store on a good day. Bread? Hope you have yeast and flour. Disinfecting spray? Don't even think about it. The world has been through this before. Not in our lifetime, not to this extent, but it has. That should be a consolation, but when I think about the Spanish Flu epidemic of 1918, it's a small comfort because that was also in medias res with two world wars and the Great Depression, so that doesn't exactly inspire confidence in a return to normalcy any time soon. And now they are talking about springing us all from house arrest in a couple of weeks, before this thing has even totally ramped up. God help us all.

We like to read and study history. We learn from it- some more than others. But, for better or worse, we are living history Right. At. This. Moment. As someone who needs to get things out on paper, I think it's important to make a record of this experience, hence the blog. I'm not sure what this will comprise, exactly, but it will be my experience and it will be real. Good days and bad days. If I happen to catch the virus (which experts are saying has a 40-70% likelihood of happening), I'll do my best to write about the reality of it, so that people know what to REALLY expect and what REALLY helped (and didn't). If I don't, and my loved ones don't (praying that this is the case), then consider it an historical snapshot into the era. After all, the internet is forever.